Enabling Your Audrey Complex (Why My Eyebrows Can Never Be Too Big)


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The Products: Hard Candy 1,000 Lashes lash primer + NYC Eyebrow Compact + Mary Kay Lash & Brow building serum + NYC Ultra Moist Lip Color

The Need: I spent most of my life hating my eyebrows. Even though they are naturally high, thin and arched, I still wanted to pluck and tweeze them towards oblivion because errant hair meant certain death (or at least an OCD spiral from a 90’s era teenager). I wanted to be Gwen Stefani at her pluckiest (before she bleached them or later grew them out), minus the dark lip-liner phase. Yet, recently, it seems that the closer I grow towards 30, the more I wish my eyebrows would grow too. I want Audrey Hepburn-Lilly Collins-Demi Lavato monstrosities overhead, and nothing but sassy red lipstick below. The only problem? My eyebrows are deficient in follicles, and my lips have never touched rose-toned-shades unless on stage.

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The Lips

This mouth only recognizes red pigment when in congruence with black liner bat wings, caked-on pancake makeup, and a plethora of glittery dippity-doo (translation: ballerina times). Thanks to an early induction towards stage makeup, I’ve been terrified of almost all aesthetic theatricality since. Red lipstick is reserved for either the orally blessed like my sister (ok, that doesn’t mean what you think it means: she has perfect lips), or Stefani in her millionth cherry phase. Girls like me – with vaguely average lips and a proclivity for “schmeering” too much (either wiping product or eating a really good, Yiddish bagel combo) – shouldn’t bother. However, lately I realized something: I’m going to be 30 soon (yes, we’re back to that). If I can’t rock a bold color now without looking back, when can I? And plus, isn’t lipstick just a layman’s way of avoiding mascara for the day?

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Challenge accepted. I applied a soft cherry shade (baby steps, guys) in lieu of eye makeup or anything else, and fled the house before I had time to turn back. To be honest, it took me all day to get used to it, but I hung in, and now I’m keeping this as part of my weekly “go to” routine.

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The Brows

After some trial and error, I finally figured out a brow plumping technique that works wonders. And since I’m teaching my 4-year-old to share with her peers, I’ll spill the beans thusly. In short, “the magic is in the makeup” (seriously Gwen? Are you ghost-writing this article?) I start out by layering a growth encouraging serum over my sparse, naked brows (you can even use something designed for eyelashes), before adding white mascara primer in an upwards motion. Yes, you read that right: white mascara primer. I stole this tip from xovain initially, but it seriously works! Apply the white fibers to your eyebrows until they appear thicker, and let it dry… but fear not, because it makes an amazing “elongater” for your eyelashes too! Finally, dab a small brush into a non-sparkly eyeshadow which closely matches your brow shade, and carefully fill them in with a “dabbing” motion. You can do repeat layers of fiber and shadow if wanted, but the goal is to thicken up in the most natural way possible. Don’t touch pencils or liners of any kind, friends… you want a realistic looking brow!

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Oh, and remember back when I said it took me all day long to get used to red lipstick? It also took me all day long to get used to my new hair color, which I just shifted back to my natural shade. Embracing my roots helps me save money and continue the quest to be as lazy (yet efficient) as possible when it comes to beauty routines, so it needed to happen. Thankfully, it matches my newfound eyebrow fetish too! Bring on the dark colors: this girl is letting her Greek out.

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